The final cause of the traditional marriage is one: union. “Union” is defined as “a bringing into intimate and fixed association: as a uniting in marriage” (Webster’s Third New International Dictionary, 1966: 2499). According to Robert George, "The end, goal and intelligible point is… a one-flesh union" (p. 152). Further, Roger Scruton writes that the goal of marriage is “to possess another person in a state of mutual surrender" (p. 15). Thus, in a marriage the husband and wife become united and strengthen their union utilizing two things: regular intimacy and a hope for “children” (p. 143).
The material causes of the traditional marriage are two: the husband and wife. “Marriage” is defined as “the state of being united to a person of the opposite sex as husband or wife” (Webster’s Third New International Dictionary 1966: 1384). According to Hadley Arkes, the definition of marriage “is marked in our genders – in the fact that we are made men and women” (p. 133). Further, David Forte writes, “A marriage is a voluntary association of a man and a woman…” (p. 109). Thus, the stuff of the traditional marriage includes a husband and a wife.
The formal causes of the traditional marriage are three: exclusivity, permanence, and sacredness. “Exclusive” is defined “excluding or having the power to exclude, as by preventing entrance or by debarring from possession, participation or use” (Webster’s Third New International Dictionary, 1966: 793). According to Arkes, marriage “commands exclusivity” (p. 139). He gives the example of how a husband cannot replace his wife “as though he were replacing a partner in tennis” (p. 139). Further, Robert George writes how Adam Smith “understood marriage – indeed, permanent, monogamous marriage – as a rational institution, because of its value in providing a reliably sound… context for rearing children” (p. 144). Further, “Sanctity” is defined as “the quality of sacredness; dedicated or set apart” (Webster’s Third New International Dictionary, 1966: 2008 and1996). According to Roger Scruton, “There is an internal justification of marriage in terms of its sanctity” (p. 23). Thus, the unique features of the traditional marriage are exclusivity, permanence and sacredness.
The principal agent cause of the traditional marriage is one: the “Ruler of the Nations” (p. 113). According to David Forte, “God… brings order out of chaos” (p. 110). “Chaos” is defined as “nature that is subject to no law or that is not necessarily uniform” (Webster’s Third New International Dictionary, 1966: 375). When a young person falls in love with a young lady, his thoughts and feelings are chaotic and full of drama. “The Creator” rules his chaotic feelings by introducing to him the private and sacred unity of marriage (p. 110). Thus, we can be thankful to Ruler of the Nations, because He found a way to move a person away from confusing drama toward a permanent union with the one he loves.
The traditional marriage is the optimal preparing agent for children. “Children fare much better when they are raised in a family with a mother and a father” (p. 128). Further, a child feels protected when he lives with the “intact, married, reasonably harmonious union of the child's own biological mother and father.” (p. 204). A child loves to live with his mother and father, especially when he sees his father smiling while listening to his mother when she talks. Further, “Complete households have the power to shelter, feed, clothe and protect their members in the absence of both the state and corporate largesse” (p. 114). Children grow with stable families while children shrink with social services. Further, “The family is the source of the kinds of individuals that could be entrusted with the maintenance of a free republic” (p. 102). Thus, the traditional marriage has the power to bring about security and peace in the lives of the husband, wife, children, neighbors and community.
The assisting agent cause of the traditional marriage is one: training. “Training” is defined as the “teaching, drill, or discipline by which powers of mind and body are developed” (Webster’s Third New International Dictionary, 1966: 2424). Forte writes, “Without the training given by families and religion, the darker sides of our human natures would have free rein” (p. 111). When a male student tells me in a quiet, shameful voice that he is mixed up with pornography, I tell him the good news: marriage is the perfect solution for him. The traditional marriage will teach him to focus on one lady rather than a thousand. And when a young lady tells me in a quiet, shameful voice that she is having trouble with promiscuity, I tell her the good news: marriage is what she needs and what she wants. The traditional marriage will assist her to become loyal to one young man. Further, the traditional marriage helps a person to solve problems. “The family is the most important conflict-resolution mechanism in all of society” (p. 114). If I have a problem with a student who is delivering work at a high level or who is failing to deliver the assigned work, then I prefer to speak briefly with the student’s parents rather than talk at length with a dean, since parents care much more about a student’s performance than the dean of a college.
The instrumental agent of the traditional marriage is one: religion. “Religion” is defined as “the personal commitment to and serving of God with worshipful devotion, conduct in accord with divine commands as found in accepted, sacred writings” (Webster’s Third New International Dictionary, 1966: 1918). According to Roger Scruton, “Religion is one way in which the long-term interests of society may animate the short-term decisions of its present members” (p. 6). If the husband and wife are prepared to serve the Lord in a traditional marriage, and if a child is ready to serve the Lord with his mother and father, then the short-terms interests of a community are achieved. Safe neighborhoods have homes occupied by people serving the Lord in traditional marriages. Further, Scruton writes, “It is natural that marriage should beset from within as something divinely ordained, with a sacred aura that reinforces the undertaken duties and elicits the support of the tribe” (p. 6). Sacred writing motivate the members in the traditional marriage to perform their duties and to be supported by others. "Honorabile connubium in omnibus” – “Marriage should be honored by all" (Ephesians 13: 4).
The counseling agents of the traditional marriage are numerous. According to John Adams, “The foundation of national morality must be laid in private families” (p. 101). David Forte writes that according to Aristotle, “In the friendship of marriage and in their growth in the practice of virtue, the husband and wife become free and equal in their humanity” (p. 105). Further, Forte writes, “Both the Anti-Federalists and the Federalists relied upon the family as a school of virtue.” (p. 109). According to Robert George, “Adam Smith and David Hume… explicitly defended the institution of marriage and opposed whatever was likely to harm it, such as easy divorce” (p. 144). Further, W. Bradford Wilcox writes, “This” defense of the traditional marriage by trustworthy experts “sounds quite familiar to the perennial wisdom of the Western moral tradition, articulated by figures such as Aristotle… and St. Thomas Aquinas. Sadly, many in the West have lost sight of this wisdom, and our children – especially children in poor and working-class homes – are paying the price” (p. 252).
The induction involving the traditional marriage is a study. “Study” is defined as “a literary work serving as an experimental or as an exploratory analysis of a carefully observed subject” (Webster’s Third New International Dictionary, 1966: 2268). According to Maggie Gallagher, “In the last thirty years, thousands of studies evaluating the consequences of marriage for children and society have been conducted in various disciplines, such as psychology, sociology, economics, and medicine” (p. 198). We can see that a set of intact families brings about safe and secure neighborhoods. “Communities where good-enough marriages are common have better outcomes for children, women, and men that do communities suffering from high rates of divorce, unmarried childbearing, and high-conflict marriages” (p. 199).
The history of the traditional marriage includes the tremendous support from two philosophers: Aristotle (384-322 BC) and St. Thomas Aquinas (1224 - 1274 AD). According to Don Browning and Elizabeth Marquardt, “Aristotle provided much of the naturalistic and philosophical language for the centrality of kin altruism in family theory found in Western philosophy, law and religion” (p. 37). Aristotle understood marriage as the basic block of a community and appreciated how the traditional marriage has a husband accepting his children and a wife investing in her children. Further, according to Browing and Marquardt, “Thomas Aquinas was one of the architects of the sacramental view of marriage that has so much influenced marriage theory in Christian nations in recent centuries” (p. 39). St. Thomas understood marriage as a sacrament and appreciated how the traditional marriage has a husband loyal to his wife and a wife attached to her children. It is clear that a child blossoms when he is accepted by his father, his mother trusts his father, and his mother loves him.
There is one analogy of the traditional marriage: like a contract. “Contract” is defined as “an agreement between two persons to do or not do something” (Webster’s Third New International Dictionary, 1966: 494). According to Harold James, “An intrusion of the characteristic way of thinking about a state or a market, namely, that they rest on contracts which can be broken, into the domain of family life, will undermine not just families, but also states and markets” (p. 73). If the traditional marriage has a contract in the exact same way as states and markets, then the traditional marriage will be downgraded, state contracts will be ruined and business contracts will be undermined. The traditional marriage is an exclusive, permanent and sacred relationship upon which states office and business markets depend. James writes, “It is here the the family holds a central position” (p. 73).
Six signs give the message that the traditional marriage is positive. “Positive” is defined as “marked by acceptance or approval, indicating affirmation” (Webster’s Third New International Dictionary, 1966: 1770). According to Maggie Gallagher, “Marriage is an important social good associated with an impressively broad array of positive outcomes for children and adults alike” (p. 198). To illustrate, the traditional marriage “increases the likelihood that children enjoy warm, close relationships with parents, reduces child poverty,” and leads to healthier children, who are also more likely to do well at school and “graduate from college.” Further, children in the homes with traditional marriages are “healthier on average,” are “less likely to commit crimes,” and “less likely to experience domestic violence” (p. 199). Thus, the traditional marriage leads to positive results for the husband, wife, children, neighborhoods, schools and community.
The motive for the traditional marriage is one: nature. “Natural” is defined as “based upon the innate moral feelings or inherent sense of right and wrong held to characterize mankind” (Webster’s Third New International Dictionary, 1966: 1506). According to Jennifer Roback Morse, “Marriage is an organic, pre-political institution that emerges spontaneously from society” (p. 75). A young man naturally wants to give himself to a young lady and to become united in an exclusive, permanent and sacred relationship with her. And if the young lady reciprocates the natural wish of the young man, then they have an ethical and genuine friendship that will last a lifetime.
The traditional marriage triggers all the passions in general and specifically one passion in a husband and a wife: love. “Love” is defined as “the attraction desire or affection felt for a person who arouses delight or admiration or elicits tenderness, sympathetic interest, or benevolence” (Webster’s Third New International Dictionary, 1966: 1340). According to Roger Scruton, “Love” is “the principal foundation” of a marriage (p. 24). A husband who loves his wife will find her delightful and be kindhearted toward her. Similarly, a wife who loves her husband will discover he is admirable and will sympathize with him. Further, love is felt by the child for his parents. Maggie Gallagher writes that “a child feels” a “hungry love for his or her parents” (p. 211). Thus, love is the fundamental passion in the traditional marriage.
Statistics show that the traditional marriage holds a central place in business. According to Harold James, “Over three-quarters of registered companies in the industrialized world are family businesses, and… they include very large companies” (p. 61). To illustrate, the Walton family owns 49% of Walmart, the Ford family owns 40% of Ford Motor Company, and the Knight family owns 84% of Nike.
I shall now use my freedom to review the above deliberation and investigation… I shall now use my freedom to make a choice. My two favorite reasons above are the final cause and the formal cause. I shall now use my freedom to make a command. The traditional marriage is very good, because the traditional marriage involves a husband and wife who become united with regular intimacy and a hope for children. Plus, the traditional marriage involves a sacred vow to become permanent and exclusive. Therefore, the traditional marriage is good.
An objections to the above deliberation states that the traditional marriage is bad, since the traditional marriage excludes a person who has a temporary attraction to another person of the same gender. As Robert George writes, “It does not matter whether the love is between two people of opposite sexes or the same sex” (p. 156). The reply is to state that the traditional marriage involves a husband and wife who become united with regular intimacy and a hope for children. Plus, the traditional marriage involves a sacred vow to become permanent and exclusive. As a result, the traditional marriage has limits that benefit the spouses, the children, their neighborhoods and communities. Robert George writes, “Once reason has been separated from experience, and thought has been freed from tradition, people will increasingly challenge any arrangement that seems to be grounded in experience and tradition as opposed to cognition and ideals” (p. 145). If a person wishes to support the opportunity for inverted people to get married, then he is supporting tolerance apart from experience, ideals apart from tradition and superficial relationships apart from genuine marriages.
Final remarks. It is clear that a traditional marriage is the best place for husbands, wives and children.
© By Theodore Faulders, September 25, 2012.